Return.

For the las past weeks, I couldn't have done anything...nothing that I had to do.I guess it was a way to be a rebel, or to unleash the teenager that tries to dye and to push away the adult is getting ready to make his presence known.I like to think I'm mature enough to handle this, but the truth is, I'm childish enough to be afraid of the changes that take place in me, and it's pretty scary.I spent the last (10) days to discover myself again, to get to know me, to find out if I still have the same dreams and if I still go on the direction I wanted.But, days go on, and I don't figure out anything, on contrary, I get more and more confused with every step I take, or, maybe I thought I've taken.I don't know much, but I have the feeling I'm not searching  the answers in the right place.It's like I have the wrong map or something.I miss those days when I used to get out of the house every day even just for a walk with a friend, or just to walk to the market place..I guess in all our lives we'll have a time when we'll miss and think about how good it was "back then".I just can't realize how to make this period of my life more sweet than bitter.A best and most special friend of mine told me last weekend while we were typing on Yahoo! Messenger, that we should learn from our past and present so in our future we won't cry this days either.I needed to hear that, it was like a cold shower, and for a second I felt better, 'cause I realized, even if we're thousands miles away, literally half-way 'round the world, we still have that thing what always bonded us.It's good to know you still have your friends even when you see them just one time a year, or not at all.It's a radical change, from spending all your time with some persons and the next day not to be able to call them every day, not saying anything about having fun together.
There are changes in life you can't manage, and there are choices others make for you.There is nothing to be afraid of, it's just life.I know, life can be the scariest thing could happen to somebody, but on the other hand, it could be the best thing happening ever.I don't know about you guys, but I wanna be the kind of woman that, when my feet hit the floor every morning, the devil says:"oh crap, she's up!".