Go light your world

I know I started to write weekly “what I’ve learned last few days” and I kinda messed up, I did it once on Monday and once on a Tuesday, but I thought it’s better to do it every Monday, cause it’s like a start, and you can start your week with some things to think about…so…let’s see how was this last week.

what I’ve learned last few days:

1.   1. from time to time, forget about your busy schedule  and do something spontaneous;it might take some courage to do it, but I think it worths..(I’m not talking about doing something dangerous, ok?)

2.   2. take time to read, it’s the enrichment of your soul

3.   3. do not complain when God brings some tough times in your life;He does it because He loves you and He wants to teach you something

4.   4. a day spend with your sister is such a blessing.(I really missed you, sister!)

5.   5. attitude matters!look after the lesson you need to learn, not after all that heavy stuff you can bear no longer

6.   6. respect the persons whose call is to be missionaries, encourage them, pray for them, it is not easy, even if you don’t realize it

7.   7. pray hard!it’s the best, deadliest weapon we have and we must use it as much as possible

8.   8. express yourself.enjoy your lifeJ

9.   9. spending time with new people, means making new friends.

Wait.. I didn’t say I’m done.I said there something that sounds like “enjoy the tough times God lets your life”.You might think I made a mistake but I’m here to tell I you I meant it.And yes, I have the right to say it.Even though ther are lots of people having harder times than mine, I’m not here to judge, I just want to share with you a little bit of my heart.Last night, I was lying in my bed sorounded in the darkness, I started to think how it’ll be today at the doctor…will my wrist be healed and I’ll be ok, or I’ll need to carry another cast for a while?i was wondering, how it must feel to “have my hand back”..And a thought passed thru my mind.The same way I felt without being able to use my hand, must feel God when we walk away from Him and we get hurt…It’s pretty hard to explain the concept, cause I can’t compare me with the almighty God who created everything, including me, but based on what Scripture says that we(the Christians) are the Body of the Christ, I was thinking…what if I am His arm and I’m down, I’m depressed or I’m hurt, He can’t use me anymore and He takes care of me.It’s not that He can’t do anything without me, I mean I can do almost all the things I used to do without my hand but I choose to use it and same it’s you with God:He chooses to use us to show His strength, His power, His mercy and like I will teach my hand again to do some of the stuff I used to do without thinking, He teaches us how to be useful for Him.And today when they took the cast off I was so happy “yaayy I ‘got’ my hand back” He’s happy when we come at Him and we choose to live with Him.

I don’t know how much you understand out of it, but this is in my mind and I know I understood it, I just tried to share it with you…

song of the day

New York, babe!!!:d

“…heeeyyy, I’ve been to New York!!!I need two healthy hands to write fast enough to write down ALL my thoughts!..first of all, I LOVE NEW YORK!!no..I ADORE NEW YORK!!!..”(a piece of the message I left to my BFF yesterday when I got home)

    I guess it’s your turn now to find out some thoughts about New York…I wanted to write this entry yesterday, when I was all excited and “fresh” with all the impressions New York left in my person…The thing is: I fell asleep around 8 o’clock(after approximately 1hour and a half after I got home) and I woke up only this morning at 9:45am.

   I started my New York Day at the train station.I was nervous, excited, and happy:it was my first time when I travelled with a long distance train in USA and I was heading to New York!!!!So, once we got there, we followed the crowd up to the heart of Manhattan..up on the streets..As soon as we were on the street, I was amazed…looking up in every direction, I didn’t know which building to admire first..I was in 7^th heaven while we were walking down on 38^th street to Romanian Consulate.People are so nice and sociable, if you look at them, they smile.:)If you smile, they say “Hi, how are you?”.At least 3 persons asked me what happened to my hand.As I walk on the streets passing hurry people, I forgot I was down there in that immense metropolis where the chances to meet somebody I knew were minimum, and I started to smile.You smile delighted with flowers, stairs, trees, weather, wind, sun, buildings, people.

The city is like a big giant heart that pumps energy through all the streets, like all the noise and the rush, it’s a Red Bull for you!...fills you with energy that never ends:).And wow, the buildings, the people, the music, the sound of the city that never sleeps!..the yellow cabs were everywhere.Just a lifted hand and you’ve had it!..Charming:)The building were huge, looking at them I thought the sky is just one hand away, but in the same time you feel how you’re stunning cause you realize you’re so small and “petite”, and no, not the clouds are flying in the sky, the huge sky-scraper next to you will crumble(the best feeling of all day long).

Still happy(yes, HAPPY!) and surprised of everything’s going on around me and what’s happening to me I turn around for a quick peek and I am speechless!..yes, I’m on BROADWAY..

After not even an hour, I’m walking down the streets all alone, this nice guy asks me what I’ve done with my hand..small-talk at a red light and you’ve got a ‘minute friend’.Though, we still have something in common: we both were for the first time in New York…he, a tanned, ash-blonde hair Californian with some shabby pants, me, a jersey girl(which is a nice one this time..).

Me and Marylena reunited, had lunch at this tinny little noisy restaurant..tuna salad and water is perfect for the whole day..And we go to ‘explore’ the Broadway ..pictures, sensations, stops, people, cops, horses, singers, live interviews, gigantic advertising spots.We stop on some stairs at Times Square, get some rest(for our feet, we walked all day), we admire the whole spectacle the Broadway shows us.Suddenly, we decide to go to see Central Park.Some giy sends us on 33^rd Street..After walking all the way back to 33^rd Street, we can find anything in the world(even a Victoria’s Secret)  but Central Park.Well, we couldn’t find it cause Central Park is on 57^th Street…:)so we decided to go to the train station and go back to our lives…

So, this was my first adventure in New York..Hope it relates all my happiness and excitement of feeling like HOME in an enormous city where I knew nobody and everybody doesn’t have time .

 I’ll return..to get to know better the New York..

to taste it..

to luxuriate in …slowly, with small pieces…today Manhattan, tomorrow Brooklyn…

Buh-bye, New York..till next time.Hope to come back soon…

And when I think I did all of these after a night of 45 minutes of sleep…I was right when I said New Yorks gives you the energy you need to enjoy every piece of it..of life!

Dreams, decisions and life...

And here I am..with my cup of coffee untouched and so happy:)...finally, one of super dreams will come true!oohh..can't wait!..And here I am: music turned up loud, dancing and spinning and jumping all over the place!But do not forget, Im a girl so soon all these manifestations of my happiness will be forgotten when I'll freeze like in front of a cop.What should I wear?..oh yeah...you guys don't know and don't understand(do not try to..) us, girls..We have a really complicated complex way to transform ourselves in some beauty goddesses or pretty princesses(the last one i like the most) after some unwritten rules that every woman knows them and doesn't have the courage to break them.It's weird to see how women all around the world care about their image, how they talk, walk, laugh, even cry...every woman I'm sure spent time in front of the mirror practicing her best smile, her best countenance, her best look...everything.Cause, how would you dare to go out there without being perfect?Women will be happy for your embarrassment  and men will ignore you.And you, asa women, can't let a situation like that to happen.Yes, I might sound like a fashion weirdo but, if you take a second, you're honest with yourself, and look around you a lil bit, you'll see I'm right!I don't say all of these because I am glad is like that, I'm talking about all these because it started to get out of control all these things.I am FOR beauty and elegance and femininity, but what all these things became today is like an unspoken war, something ppl care too much about, and they forget.They forget how to admire a beautiful lady, how to appreciate a nice presence, how to enjoy the date, and all the things that matter just fade away in front of all decisions you have to make BEFORE you even get out of your bed in the morning:what you wear, how you wear, when you wear it, and so on..I'm not telling you, ladies, to stop caring what you wear or how you present yourself to the world, just, try to relax one moment and enjoy the fact of being a woman, a princess.I enjoy fashion, and clothes and shoes and accessories(i'm a woman), but this life is much more than some clothes...

  And now, back to "reality"... I'll go to a church for a presentation(my friend will present her mission trip to Romania from this year), what should I wear??
song of the day

Anna's world

   Today, on our way back home from church, Anna:”Vio!This will last you for 100 years” and she kisses me quickly…I was so touched, I told her back:”But Anna, kisses are soooo special, I need more cuz 100 years is such a looooonnng time…” ..I closed my eyes and I enjoyed every kiss she gave me, I can still feel her sticky lil lips touching my cheeks with a fanatic innocence and so much love from her little heart.I just had one of those special moments I love in life, and I am happy I shared it with you, Anna! 

Live Out Loud

    
Since yesterday I spent 10 minutes outside.Ugh..I know..not the best thing to share, right?Well..the weekend's gone and I have a lot to study, but today it's time for sharing...

what I've learned las few days:

1. do not rush to finish your projects, even if they take longer than you expected.

2. do not yell at somebody, even if you're really really really mad:you'll be sory after that and you'll realize, your bad mood is not gonna go away if you yell at some innocent person

3. use the summer as much as you can: visit, explore, new places, new people..

4. be happy! doesn't really matter how many friends you have(or don't), how many movies you've seen or how good you are at math.enjoy your life:with the goods and the bad.

5. don't let anyone tell you you're not important or you're not capable of something just because they think you've failed.

6. if you feel like a princess, show it.tell people you are a princess(I'm not talking about that mean princesses, ok?..In fact, they might be one king's daughter, but a tiara doesn't make you a princess.-this is another story, I'll make a post one day about it) and behave like one.

7. don't lose your faith when you think you've lost the battle.

8. take a lot of pictures, in the end, all you're gonna have will be a bunch of pictures and your memories.

9. do not be afraid to talk about your feelings.

today's words of wisdom: 

   A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the

bones.(Proverbs 14:30, NIV)

song of the day

SIXTY days..

Isn't it great to have the opportunity to live your life with the person you love the most and for whom you would do anything?The one who shares your dreams and thinks you're gorgeous all the time.The one that laughs at your silly jokes, encourages you to do things you like, hugs you with no reason and the one who doesn't need a Valentine's Day to make you feel special and loved.The one who would come half-way around the world just to be with me, the one who can't sleep when I'm not ok, and says "I love you" every 2 minutes without ever getting tired.The one that cheers me up when I have a bad day, and is ready anytime to listen me, the one with the greatest smile in the world and he shares it with me.The one who brighten up my days and the one who would give up everything for me.
The one I like to sit next to, and the one I'm not afraid to be me with.The one that I'm proud of and I can't wait to see, dream of, imagine how our kids will look like.The one I fight for.
Thank you for living your life with me.I LOVE YOU!
60 days...because there are 2 months since we've got engaged.:)

song of the day

911 and help is on the way

Being home all day long it's not the best part of my life, right now, but I found out that I can use all this time in my favor and transform it from "borring three months home" in "those three months when I stayed home b/c of my broken wrist but I had a great time and I did something with it"..so, with this in mind, I decided yesterday to go to Ladies Bible Study at my sister's church.Nice...:)I'll post a picture I really like..(sory for the quality, I'm still trying to figure out how to use it to its best power).So, the decision turned out to be perfect, we had a great time, and even if i was the youngest of them all, I felt blessed:you guys of my age, really have what to learn from the ones who saw more then us how's life...The most, I liked, the ideea with 911..Let me explain:)..So, you have an emergency you call 911 and as soon as you call they know who you are and where to come...the same thing is with Jesus:sometimes we call Him, but we really don't know what to say or how to say it...But He knows.He knows what's your problem and He can fix it.And probably, sometimes, we don't hear Him, but that doesn't mean He's not here to help us.So, talk to Jesus, and wait.It might look an eternity till the ambulance is there, but it only takes few minutes actually.
I realized in the last week I used a lot(too much) the words not complaining and it's kind of annoying.So I would say they are the ugly word(s) of the week.Because I said them too much and I didn't mean it.I was soooo depressed!!What's the point?..ugh...UGLY WORDS.don't use them..
Another thing to say:I twisted my hand the other night, since then it hurts so bad, but this is not smth exciting for you:)..
Somthing exciting for me: I have couple of pages and I'll finish my 3rd set of lessons.I am happy, thanks God I can do it:).

The repetition of small efforts will accomplish more than the
occasional use of great talents.(Charles H. Spurgeon)

song of the day

I'll stand!

I'll come back with some more thoughts, but for now I just want to share with you this.Listen to it carefully and you'll find it really deep.

fericirea noastra = ranile celorlalti

Am observat in ultima vreme cu cata usurintza spunem lucruri negandindu'ne ce efect ar avea asupra persoanei de langa noi care le aude.Iti dai seama ca ai ranit, dar tot mergi inainte, pe urmatoarea treapta si mai faci si acele gesturi care inrautatzesc situatia.Nu te opresti sa spui un sincer 'iarta-ma'(este considerat a fi o slabiciune sa spui acest cuvant) si treci mai departe in alergarea te spre ceea ce numesti implinire.Nu acorzi atentie la ceea ce se merita, te ingrijorezi ce poate fi dupa prima cotitura sau ce se ascunde in spatele fiecarei usi nedeschise, te plangi ca esti prins intr'un lant de evenimente care determina a fi zile, faci planuri si te inspaimanta propria'ti umbra.Alegi compania oamenilor pt a nu te simti atat de las, si o iei de la capat, mergand in cerc, intrebandu'te ce ai facut gresit, incercand sa faci ceva diferit, iar la sfarsitul zilei esti tot acolo:ranind, improscand, fugind.Ajungi la momentul cheie, vezi inimile triste cu care ti'ai presarat drumul, si ochii intrebatori ce'ti ies in cale.

La sfarsit, iti dai seama ca nu s'a meritat, ca ar fi trebuit sa spui "iarta'ma" sa te bucuri de lucrurile frumoase si sa apreciezi o vorba buna..

PS: I'll translate it into English when I have some time..promise guys.

yesterdays..

what i've learned last few days...

1.you can run, but the past is always next to you, no matter how far it could seem to be;
2.the world is so small, even if u are at the other end of the world, there is 99% chanses to meet somebody who knows a friend of your old mate's brother's wife and so you can feel like you have a lil piece of 'home' in that strage place;
3.you can pretend you're somebody else, but in the end, the truth will come out;
4.those moments when you think you have ur friends closer then ever, but in reality they're just using you, or at least, act like they are using you and you can't get it, no matter how hard you try(ouch, it hurts!);
5.if you're not single anymore, that doesn't mean you can't have fun anymore;
6.just because you feel useless, that doesn't mean that's true;
7.if you think your problems will go away while you're sleeping, you'll be very dissapointed;
8.a shopping day is never too long, too borring, and you didn't buy enough things;
9.when your heart is broken, you can eat chocolate and you'll feel better, or you can cry until u'll fall asleep.when you'll wake up things will be different.or not.

I can't promise you all these works for everybody, but I'm 100% possitve they are for me!.
One day..we won't fight no more and our children will play...


someday...one day.

did u eat your happy cookie today?

Yesterday was awesome!We went to Columbus flea market oh my God!...gorgeous!...I have no words...I liked it sooooo much, we found so many things, i didn't really buy too many things, but my sis was..wow:)..I bought this really super extra cute necklace and a vintage heart I'll put Eddie's picture in it and umm..what else:)...oh yeah, a Crest SpinBrush Pro Clean toothbrush which is A-M-A-Z-E-I-N-G.and..i took some pictures with my camera.I was happy yesterday at shopping...oh...I almost forgot!...the best pizza ever I ate there..same taste with the one from Seaside..
Today was and still is painful.Lately, for some reason i end up messing things instead of helping out others and be there for them when they need me.That hurts and it makes me feel miserable, but I'm not gonna give up trying and trying.Not complaining..
That's enough for now, I gotta get ready for church..yep, I forgot to mention, us(me, my sis and my cousin) decided to go at this Baptist church see how it is.I'll keep u updated ...see you!

sunshine over my rainbow.

Yesterday I talked with this person that I call 'a friend'.He said he's probably gonna move to Pa, and for a second I felt like my only true friend from here is leaving me...it's not a strange feeling, it's just strange cuz I didn't think I would care about that person being here or somewhere else on this planet.
Today I had another "half-half" day..not a really tough one, though.First, I finished my project and it was a success, the instructor said I did a great job.I'm still so excited that ...Eddie was funny..we were talking when I saw the grade(100%), I started to jump, dance, scream, hug and kiss the air and after that the pillow...It might be weird for you to see me that excited about school, but i really like what i do and...it's not a secret:)..the other reason for my happiness is the new camera I got..finally:).now I can go visit, my memories will be with me;)..
The bad part of the day was my really annoying extremly painful head ache..Actually, a migraine.It's not completly gone, but I definetly feel better!..:)
That's it for today.I'm tired ...see you guys..

your life is yours but it doesn't belong to you

I just started to write smth for my graded project, 'cause I got some ideas and I'm so excited about the whole thing, I finally have the feeling I do smth helpful for my life.It's a good feeling..like my life starts to have a contour, a "shape", and it's kinda going to one direction, not going nowhere anymore.
So, I wrote a letter today, actually, the letter...it's the first letter i send to my fiance from here..it's sort of sad romantic excited personal way to comunicate.And slow.
Later I'll go with my sister at ACmore(for my nieces) I'm so excited, I'll have like 2 hours to spend in that perfect place!!!we go at ACmore 'cuz they have this crafty-thing to do for kids and after that they can take home the crafts they did there, it's cool, makes me wish to be a kid again... I'll just skip to the next thought, I'm pretty sure you don't wanna hear(read) about "I didn't have this and I didn't have that" childhood.Still, I want to mention that

I had a great super funny full of events childhood

and i enjoyed it every single moment.
Next in line...my sister told me smth about the jews today(my brother in law knows everything-if not everything, almost everything- about jews)and I was a lil bit ...umm...amazed, you know, I'm pretty sure it's wonderful to live in the time of one of the books of the Bible, but to see and live in the time when the book of revelation is fulfilled, it's a feeling that I can't really explain..I mean, everybody's saying we live the end of the days, but sometimes it feels like you can reach that end, it's just like you can stretch out your hand and "grab" the end...pretty scarry if you don't know what you did, you do and/or will do with your life..I'll ask my bro'-in -law to give me that link and maybe I'll post it...just in case.:)
So..folks, DON'T FORGET...your life is yours but it doesn't belong to you, you know, it doesn't depent on you not at all, the life came somewhere from the above your life isn't yours, it Jesus'!

because i miss too many things

Still didn't finish your letter, sweet friend..it's like i don't want to give away that magic..'cuz when i'll finish it, i probably feel lonely again...maybe relieved in the same time..
i decided today to get focused on things that make me happy!...I'll learn to play the guitar, how to sew(not hand sew), i'll practice my roller blading(hope won't break anything again:">)but first of all, I'll go and find a doctor for my knee...and take care of it so i can be more like normal..
Is it me, or ppl have a strange behavior in last days?oohh, don't worry about me, i'll be here with ...me.

they told me to shut up

it's not like the title would actually have smth to do with what I write, but...at a second thought, it's kinda true in a way..WHATEVER..not complaining..

nu e ca si cum as avea that crazy life unde n'am timp nici sa rasuflu, din contra, ma simt uneori k o pensionara..cu prea mult timp pe maini si parca nu ma vad in stare sa fac ceva de calitate cu el..doar stau si ma plang.imi doresc sa schimb ceva, but i'm a lil bit confused..

I wish I wasn't alone tonight...again

time..

PS: today, august 9th, it's been a year since I left...

moments of solitude..

I started to write a letter to my BFF and i couldn't finish it in like...3 days for now?!and I'm wondering....how long it will take, at last, to the moment when i'll get it to the post office and SEND it.and the real reason it's not that i don't have what to tell her.Perhaps u're wandering why would i send letters to my bff who's living...*take a deep breath* thousands miles away!ok, i tell you the whole truth...i'm in a far far far away kingdom which is not really my wish, but for now, this is the life, i am here and i'm not gonna start complaining.it wouldn't help at all..
*sigh* i feel a lil bit better..
Last night i had terrible pains, and this night won't be different...i already took a tylenol and the pain just loves my, i guess..yep, it's the cast..actually not the cast is the problem..the problem is my broken bone.i wanna go for a walk at the park, i feel like i'm gonna find some friends.
*moment of thinking*
I need some friends which i can go out with...

copilarii de adulti

Cer patat de nori si inceput de zi monoton..sambata.N'am chef de nimic, nici macar sa dorm.Ce bine ca se gaseste mami sa ma scoata pana la magazin..sunt imbufnata si fitzoasa, capsa pusa, altfel spus.Dar tot raul spre bn...ma plimb printre rafturi, repetandu'mi in gand:"n`ai bani, nu`ti permiti sa`ti cumperi.." si totusi!!era acolo!!!....albastru cu roz se imbinau perfect cu nasturii de metal...o pun p mine[ma chinui, desigur...i'm a cripple...nu uitatzi asta:)..]si merg mandra prin magazin...nu o mai dau jos...o ador...si'apoi si Levishii aia asa scurti:x...hainele curg..printre altele mi'am gasit si masa...si tabla speciala sa invatz in pat...if i want to:)vara'mea imi spune ca m'ar bate.numai eu imi gasesc chestii faine.si'ar gasi si ea...doar ca ea vrea totul ieftin, da' cu eticheta!...nesimnificativ!..
imi place de princess a mea, spune la toti ca sa aibe grija cum ma trateaza, ca inca am the cast on..si k sor'mea e maritata acum...nu ca n'ar fi adevarat, dar are un fel asa naiv de a spune lucrurile...
Raman uimita de un copil, iar timpul trece.

what is your mistery, life?

There is a weird fact about this summer: extremely rainy.And this is making the days perfect for sleepy days when you're lying in the bed, watching movies and write love letters.Not a chance that would inspire you some responsibility to study something..and i don't really care anymore...do I?
Life wasn't exactly how i was expected for the las few days...or weeks,I already lost the count...Have you ever felt like this, when everything's the same but it starts to mean anything else for you and so on...And before you can figure out what's going on, everything's out of control and you try to repair some mistakes you did and make a bigger one instead ...So depressing the feeling, like you'll never be the same and you'll never handle it ...it's like you're not able to face it and to take care of problems.and then, because you're desperate, you're looking for smth to take the blame.anything.for me, was the cast...it's like a shield where I am protected of all the words that hurt me... oohhh nevermind!..what do you know?
Life is more rainy days than sunny days...what matters is how to travel with the rain and how to make from it an ally, not an enemy.

pentru ca 'azi' este 'maine' de care te'ai temut si 'ieri' de care iti este dor

E ciudat sa incepi sa scri ceva ce nici nu sti ca vrei sa spui...sa scoti cuvinte din sertarul mintii fara sa fi sigur ca vrei sa le faci cunoscute.si totusi, le dai afara ca pe o mancare stricata...cu naduf!
Azi...a fost ceva unic.nu, nu ma intelege gresit..n'a fost 'ziua perfecta' asa cum imi imaginez eu(poate o data am sa vbesc si despre zile perfecte...).A fost unica, pt ca am facut un lucru unic...am spus "nu" la ceva ce vroiam atat de mult, dar stiam ca nu este ok sa il am.nu ma refer sa un lucru sau o persoana..ceva mult mai mult decat atat.un secret, o taina...stiu ca am facut lucrul care trebuie, dar ce este interesant, nu ma simt libera..credeam ca o sa ma simt mai bine, mai bucuroasa, ca am avut puterea d a alege ceea ce este bine.Imi este teama in schimb.teama de a pierde ce am, de a fi inteleasa gresit.Ar trebui sa fiu linistita, insa in schimb, o lupta se da in mine..lupta de a da timpul inapoi si a face lucrurile cum le faceam de obicei...sa spun 'da'.Credeam ca o sa fiu puternica indeajuns sa spun 'nu' si sa fiu libera.Dar vezi tu, libertatea nu se dobandeste prin putere.si totusi...
...cu ce am gresit cand am facut lucrul care trebuie???